Christmas Party in MY MIND
by Insane Rice of the Cosmos
Summary: I loose my Christmas spirit and Bee's there to make me feel better...by drinking lots of Pepsi and drawing on a passed out Megatron. WARNING Half assed story alert! oneshot


**_-huge sigh- Yes, I've been on Santa's naughty list and guess what he gave me in advance?_**

**_Writer's block, yup. -headdesk- So I'm writing this thing because my Christmas spirit's gone into a ver deep dark cave and died. I hate inserts, but I have no choice._**

**_Oh, and this takes place in my mind. That may throw you for a loop._**

* * *

A small, fairy like creature flittered into view...only to be shot down by a plasma rifle blast.

"Nice, Quakeshot...real nice." The ddecepticon's best friend, Shift, snorted, as the femmes procedded to stomp out the poor creature out of exsistance.

-

Yeah, Christmas was new to my OCs and my cheap imitations of the canon Transformers, and frankly, they were missing the point. The party hall was rather decked out, Christmas decorations everywhere, real nice stuff. Megatron was having a drinking game with Starscream, an all out rave was happening near the stage, Jazz having instigted it, of course, and Sunny was learning the hard way that mistletoe should be avoided at all costs. Especially if Ratchet was holding it out on a pole.

The only three NOT having fun here were Prowl, Red Alert, and the authoress.

And only one was actually present at the party.

-

"Hey Prowl, where's Rice?" A cheerful looking Bumblebee asked the stern looking mech. "I haen't seen her all day."

"She's in her room, grumbling and writing." Prowl answered smoothly.

"But it's Christmas!"

"Does it look or sound like she cares?"

"Either way," Bee said "She should be out here with us at the very least. Maybe I can convince her to come out here."

"Good luck. She's got Chargepulse on guard duty," Prowl said quietly "And Red Alert on monitor partol."

"I should still try."

-

The steel halls were unnervingly quiet compared to the party Bee had just come from. Dim christmas lights and garland hung from the celings, curtousy of the Dinobots and Wheeljack. But as Bee got closer and closer to trhe autoress' room, the lights grew fewer and fewer in number until they were replaced with torches. Their faint glow cast slong shadows down the hall, as Bee proceded.

Finally, Bumblebee had reached the door that led to the writer's room. Her oc Chargepulse stood dutifully in the yellow Autobot's way, leering at him with red optics. "Oh, it's you." He snorted. "Shouldn't you be at the party, insect?"

"One, stop calling me that, and two, I wanted to see if Rice wanted to come with me." Bee retorted. He never liked Chargepulse that much. Not since that one story Rice had written.

"Rice isn't to be disturbed, insect." Chargepulse said, malice in the last two syllables. "She's no fan of the holidays."

"Then why is she letting us throw a holiday party, anyway?"

"The twins pestered her into it. Primus, I hate them."

"Can I at least talk to her?"

'PRIMUS, does this kid ever give up?!' Chargepulse thought irritably. Sighing heavily, he said, "Go ahead, but I'm telling you, she's not in the best mood."

-

The room's lights were dimmed. Around the room were old anime artifacts, idea and doodle notebooks and abandoned 3 liter Pepsi bottles, some full, some empty. At the end of the room, a bright light came from the computer screen that the authoress was seated in front of and the outline of a bed could be seen in the corner of the room.

"Rice?" Bee came closer to the female, who gave a loud belch and turned to see the mech standing over her. Her black hair was unkempt and untidy, her sliver rimmed glasses gleamed slightly and the decepticon insignia could be seen on her black wristband. Her shirt said in bold whilt letters, " If you can't read this, you have a life", snd her jeans were...well, jeans. What more can I say?

"Oho, it's you, Bee." Rice said, grinning slightly. "Nice to see you here, but I thought I told Chargepulse to keep everyone out...No matter. I'll just kill him in one of my fics. Soooo, whaddya want, eh? I'm drowning my sorrows right now."

"In Pepsi?"

"Spot on, that stuff." A distinct hiccup came from the female. "I've recived bad news from our funder person, Toaster, mate. That's why I'm stuck in here."

"And what exactly would that be?"

" The count from the Imagionation Center came in. One more fic idea and I'm possibly done for good. Nothing else is turning up that's wacky and insane anymore. I'm a HASBEEEEEEEN. "She hiccuped again."I'll have to scrap my ocs, and you canons will wake up and realize that you being in ANY of my fics will all have been a very bad dream, aand you'll forget everything." Another hiccup. "That's why all the Pepsi."

"But why Pepsi?"

"Would you prefer rum? Gin? Tonic? Vodka? Cider?"Rice began listing them off her fingers.

"Cider's not alcholic..."

"SO THEY SAY." Rice snarled, then promptly did a headdesk on her keyboard. "UGH. I'm washed up...But enough of my problems. Why are you here?"

"I was wondering why you didn't join us at the party." Bee said, looking at the authoress with concern in his optics.

"HAH! I'm not a party person, Bee. I steal the Pepsi, crash on the couch, and wake up with insane ideas about writing. Brutal cycle, that."

"Maybe you should come with me, and you may get some new ideas. They have Pepsi...if Megatron didn't try to drink it all again."

"THAT WORTHLESS PRICK. If he did he's going to wake up very confused and in bed with Optimus." Rice grumbled, standing from her seat, streatching and listening to her spine pop and crack. "Alright, big guy, I'll go with you. Just remember that I must get much Pepsi before my brain starts working again,"

-

_At the party..._

Bee didn't understand why Rice had said she wasn't a party person.

Despite the fact that she was constantly writing, she was really good at singing. As she bellowed the lyrics to 'Bleed It Out', he watched her in awe. Jazz had scheduled a duet with her some time that night, and everyone was excited.

"Didn't think you could get her out of that room, Bee." Optimus said, slamming the yellow bot on the back, an energon cube in hand. "How'd you do it?"

"I mention Pepsi, and she comes right out. Really!" Bee said modestly.

"Impressive, Bee, truely impressive.

-

Starscream and Megatron had passed out from their game, and the Autobots and Decepticons had made up a new party game, called, 'Make Me Pretty'. Add a few passed out drunks and make up, Sharpies, and paint together and you have the mentioned game.

Rice was showing her artistic flair by doodling/ tattooing Megatron with tribal looking designs in Sharpie, Bee assisting her, of course. The Decepticons anda few Autobots wer slopping pink paint all over Starscream and adding rude messages onto the Seeker's wings.

Sunny and Sides' messages won fisrt prize.

On Starscream's right wing, Sunny had written, 'Space for rent', and Sides had written on the other wing, 'Inquire within'

-

Eventually, the singing came back on, and Jazz got a duet with Rice, just like he said he would. And the last thing Rice remembered was crashing on a large couch that seemed to have come out of nowhere.

* * *

**_Yes, I do believe I half assed this story, yes, I think I'm slipping in my writing, and yes, I've always wanted to draw on megatron in Sharpie._**


End file.
